Home for the Holidays (and reveries of high school days)

I sang at a funeral today.

Coming home is great for my self-esteem. All the adults at church thinks I'm wonderful. It's really nice.
Although there are awkward times... Crazy people and noisy sacrament meetings are still in great abundance. On the other hand, I was reminded today though of all the great people in my home ward--there are quite a lot of people I look up to and admire.

I hung out with old high school friends yesterday and enjoyed every minute of it. I spoke of them in my last entry of them and realized we were losing touch. Sometimes I have a few negative connotations with high school--all the insecurities involved and growing pains. However, seeing them yesterday brought back a lot of good memories. I honestly can't complain--I had a large, close, good group of friends. We meshed in a lot of ways I do not quite click with college friends. We had similar interests--after all, we met because of our similar interests and goals, namely AP and other advanced classes. Some were in choir and other similar extracurricular activities with me too. We are all still nerds who are studious but clever and funny. We just plain click even though we don't all stay in touch. A few of them have different values, but on the whole they are just good people. Being in the Bible belt, most are religious too.
Some stay in touch better than I do though. It is interesting hearing of their college experiences--they are different than mine. On the whole, most (definitely not all) have not made as close, lifelong friends as I have had. The social scenes of other colleges are very different than that of BYU. They are not as conducive to the making of close, lifelong friends. High school friends, thus, have an even closer spot to their heart because they are the closest friends they have ever had.
It is interesting interacting with them though. I have grown up--more social, more mature, and more confident--a me they don't really know. Thus, this me does not really appear. This me is not the me they know nor expect and this me doesn't know how to interact with them. Thus, it is the old, quiet, unsure me that appears to be present. I don't know if that makes sense. It is hard for this more mature me to interact with any group that doesn't know this me because they don't expect it. I hope that doesn't seem shallow because it's not. Perhaps, it is just a sign that I am still learning and growing, and there is definitely more room for growth. :)
However, I realized last night though that I had no reason to ever, ever, ever doubt their friendship. They would have continued to be my friends and will always be my friends. My closest friends won't forget me even if we lose touch.

In sum, I am having a great time, and so my summer plans are still being debated... I was pretty sure I wasn't coming home, but now I'm not. After all, I could save a lot of money, and I have a job waiting for me. However, then I remember that 4 months is a long time and none of my friends would be in town...